fashion

The moral floral: rompers

Flowers are pretty. I think I’ll wear them. Even though I’m not smart enough to know what kind of flower I’m wearing (roses, I believe), I walk around like I DO! For real, it’s bad. Sometimes I’ll mix up a tulip from a violet…a VIOLET! My (modest) romper made me feel like quite the important person. It was a heck of an illusion ๐Ÿคซ๐Ÿ˜†

My legs and I…we have a love/hate relationship. They are sooooo long, which is cool, but there are so many clothes that I can’t wear because of this (not to mention, shaving them takes forever)!! It’s hit and miss with these things. I’ll wear shorts, just NORMAL length shorts…not too short…and I MAKE them look SUPER short. It’s a challenge to find a modest pair. Now, if the suckers were already short to begin with, it’s pretty much hopeless…About the romper…it’s dark, and it makes me look even more pale than I already am, but it’s cute, ok? Online shopping is my favorite thing, and the wonderful folks of Shein have great prices, modest clothing (I’m not one for the whole “I’m going to show as much skin as I can so guys will like me” look), AND it’s cute. Do you have any idea how hard it is to find a store with ALL THREE qualities? When I find a place like this, I stick with it. So…hope you’re ready to see more cute rompers.

“Hey…nice shoes. They look like they hurt.” Well. JOKE’S ON YOU CUZ THEY TOTALLY ONLY GAVE ME LIKE ONE BLISTER! So ha.

Now, please don’t be confused, men. Yes, I think rompers are cute, but I think the MALE romper (wait, that isn’t on trend, is it??) makes you look a little bit..hm, what’s the word…gooberish. But hey, if that’s what you’re going for, knock yourself out.

Questions? Come find me on Instagram!

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Cool things and time machines: The 80s

Do you remember the 80s? Well. Lucky you. I played dress up today and so many things that wouldn’t be acceptable today (denim on denim, “ugly” sweaters, shoulder pads, etc.) were TOTALLY HOT in the 80s. When people say “you’re so extra” OHHH MAN they totally don’t get it. It took me two hours to get ready. I was more extra TODAY then I’ve ever been in my entire life. Did people tease their hair every day? Or did people always have perms? I have so many questions. Here’s a few that I came up with…

1. Did everybody have those cute bug eyed cars? Or was that a different decade?

2. How many bottles of hairspray did you go through in a month?

3. I understand that the folks in the 80s appreciated tight clothing and heels. What if you just felt like having a casual day? What happened then? Was that when the Spandex and leg warmers came out to play?

4. Did anybody wear old fashion trends, such as poodle skirts or bell bottoms, and you were like, “ugh…get with the times”?

Ok, so maybe I put a modern twist on my outfit. I honestly couldn’t help it. I teased the CRAP out of my hair and I just couldn’t get the volume I wanted to achieve…*sniffle sniffle*.

Oh, and one more thing…Ok, so what are ‘Pillow People’? That sounds like some kind of horror film. And Garbage Pail Kids? Huh? What even is that? That sounds like it could be the sequel! Educate me.

Let me know what decade you want to see next!! Follow me on Instagram ๐Ÿ’‹

fashion

TRIGGERED

This entire generation, AMIRITE? Oh look, there’s a guy with a scarf and skinny jeans on…in the SUMMER. And oh, somebody just got offended because their acquaintance is playing Christmas music a smidge too early. And hey, look at me, I got a record player and I put black and white filters on my photos so that means I’m totally hipster. You’re not fooling anybody. Why is everybody so sensitive? Every time I turn on the news, there’s a new group of boycotting feminists because the word “man” is too much for them to handle. I think they’re waiting for the rest of the world to give them a moment of silence for being SO mistreated because somebody assumed their gender…I mean REALLY. Yo, ladies. Nobody feels bad for you. We’re over here rolling our eyes.

Here’s my proposal…we stop creating new fashion trends (or trends in general ๐Ÿ˜’) and bring back the old ones. Ay? Ay? That’s not offensive, is it? It’s almost like we’ve run out of cool ideas. “Wait, but we have cool stuff!!” Yeah, maybe like wifi and stuff…but face it, y’all. We’re kind of lazy. We wear yoga pants as ACTUAL pants (totally not judging because I’ve done it several times in the past, but hey, at least I know I’m lazy).

Soooo, my featured trend today is *drumroll* WHITE SNEAKERS (Coming at ya, Pam Beasly). White sneakers, although they shouldn’t be worn on a muddy day, make a pretty awesome partner for a pair of blue jeans…and mini skirts…and sun dresses…you know, it would probably be easier to name things that they WOULDN’T go with.

1. Prom dresses

I love these things. Almost as much as I love my Venti, soy milk, sugar free, extra shot of espresso, no foam latte. Ha, KIDDING. I’ve never been that girl. And if you are, every barista in the world hates you. But anyway…guys guys look at my shoes.

Probably showing too much arm…sorry, did I offend you? Well, that’s your fault. I said to look at my SHOES, not my arms. Ha, gotcha. Oh, and I tried to get a cute picture of me jumping but I ended up nearly decapitating myself…it’s whatever.

Come say hey ๐Ÿ‘‹๐Ÿพ follow me on Instagram! ๐Ÿ˜Ž

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Do me right, Mr. Leather

Do leather jackets make you cool? If not, I wasted my money…

I can hear it now. Aw, her jeans have holes in them!! Can she not afford a pair of new jeans? That seems to be the elderly’s favorite joke. FYI, I know that my jeans have holes, I BOUGHT them this way. But, if you still think I need some new jeans, I’m accepting donations…HA, seriously though, if you don’t like this trend, ouch, but I’m not fixin’ to change. And if I hear one more joke about my ripped jeans, I might just lose it. And probably rebel and buy MORE ripped jeans, so you better watch it. You don’t want to contribute to the problem, do you?

One of my favorite fashion trends is bringing back something retro, and putting a modern twist on it. I wasn’t alive in the 80s (FEEL BAD FOR ME) and now that things are coming back, I feel like everything is falling into place…and maybe that’s because I didn’t flunk out of college, (got my final grades back and by the grace of God, I passed my Spanish class…adios) but I’m going to say it’s because of old fashion trends coming back into style. Low key hoping that it gets cool again to describe something as “groovy” cuz that just might be my favorite adjective…

Leather (ehem…FAKE leather) isn’t just an old trend anymore. It’s hard to go wrong with one of these suckers. If you’re having trouble figuring out what you should wear with a leather jacket, pardon my French, but you’re dumb. It goes with (almost) everything. Now, if you wear it with leather pants, (and yes, that’s back in) THAT might be overkill. Be smart in your fashion decisions. I believe in you, don’t make me look like a fool.

Not to sound conceited, but I felt kinda hot in this thing…maybe the fact that it was 3 million degrees had something to do with it, but whatever.

Let’s chat. Follow me on Instagram!

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I SAID YES!!

Oh, wait…sorry, no I’m not engaged. But, now that I’ve got your attention, I DID say yes to wearing this outrageously bright dress. I’m not even gonna LIE, it made me feel like a princess. I twirled and squealed like I was a little girl again. Part of me was afraid…and NOT just because I was wearing wedges and I was constantly thinking that I was going to fall. Wearing something like this is out of my comfort zone. I love wearing dresses, it’s just this bright color. It’s normally not my thing. 75% of my wardrobe is neutral colors (that doesn’t make me boring, does it?). But I’m standing here doing something different. Baby steps, y’all. I haven’t gone skydiving yet, but I’m getting there one dress at a time. I bought this dress YEARS ago. I went through a faze where I wanted to stand out (ha, like my red hair isn’t already enough). That phase lasted for about a day. I NEVER even tried the dress on. It’s been hanging in my closet with the tags for over 2 years. Today was the day that I removed the tags, and wore that sucker. I was thissssss close to going “nah” and putting it back in my closet. SPOILER ALERT, I didn’t. Please hold your applause until the end of my post. I paired a simple belt with it, and bada bing bada boom. We have an outfit. Now, if I could manage to NOT spill anything on it, that would be great.

Come say hey! Follow me on Instagram!

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3 tips for a happy relationship

I may not be a math guru, but I did the math on this, AND checked my work. From a female’s perspective, and from what I have experienced over the years, these tips work. And NOT just for the guy in the relationship. For both of you. Believe me, I know.

1. Just because they don’t speak to you for a few hours doesn’t mean they don’t CARE.

Men and women are different. A lot of women freak out when they haven’t heard from their significant other for a while. The truth is, guys don’t think much of it. They don’t MEAN to upset you. They DO still like you. They still care! Give the homies a break. I’ve been “that girl” in the past. The one that took everything personally and thought that if the guy that I was with didn’t text me for hours, he hated me. It made me a paranoid freak. I thought, “oh, NOW he’s texting me. He’s only doing that because he feels like he has to.” Yeah. I was a lil bit crazy. Maybe I still am. But at least now I know not to lose my cool over a guy not texting me. Now, if you think that he’s ghosting you, that’s unfortunate…there’s a difference between straight up ignoring somebody and not texting them for a little while. If you’re confused, holla at me.

2. Don’t get mad at him for joking around with you

Alright. Duh. But hear me out. He jokes around with his friends like this all day. He doesn’t joke around the same way with you, because you’ll get offended. Ok, I’m gonna say it…some women are just too dang sensitive. Let the guy be himself around you, kapeesh? I’m sure that your man will appreciate that you’re cool enough to take a joke. He’ll surely get a kick out of you coming back with something smart (don’t be too petty, our goal is NOT to start an argument). There is a fine line between him being RUDE to you and him JOKING with you. Hopefully you can tell the difference.

3. Some women treat their men like a dog and expect their man to treat them like a queen

Ok, THIS I see happening a lot. The woman bosses around the man 24/7, the man says something back, and suddenly HE’S the bad guy. That needs to stop. Sometimes the roles are reversed, but I’ll save that one for later. Two words. MUTUAL…RESPECT. Some of you have this down pat, and I applaud you lovely folks. The guy shouldn’t be stuck having to pay the bill every time you go out. The girl shouldn’t feel like she has to cook you a gourmet meal every time you’re hungry. And if she does, great. That will make him feel like he needs to return the favor with a nice gesture, and then it will be her turn, and so on. What a nice cycle THAT could be.

Don’t be a stranger. Follow me on Instagram! โค๏ธ๐Ÿ˜Ž

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Instagramminโ€™, jamminโ€™, and yes maโ€™aminโ€™

To those of you who don’t speak good English, I probably just confused the heck outta you. None of those are real words, so don’t bother looking them up in a dictionary. They won’t be there. But, all English lessons aside, there are three things that I want to talk about. Gee, I bet you can’t guess what they are! Not like the title gave it away or anything…I have put together a short list of things that are GOOD for your mental health. They will make you happier, and keep you sane. And given the world that we live in, I’m not about to keep it to myself.

1. Instagrammin’

All for making “Instagrammin'” an actual word say ‘I’. Ok but seriously. LET’S GET DOWN TO BUSINESS (Mulan, anybody?). Ok, but for real this time…nah. With a title like ‘Instagrammin’, jammin, and yes ma’amin’, I don’t think there’s much hope for turning this into a serious post. But yo, follow me ๐Ÿ˜Ž๐Ÿค™

This might sound like a weird one to some people. It’s not. This really helps me, and if you’re willing to give it a shot, it can help you too! Take a GOOD picture of yourself. Get dressed up, go somewhere with a nice scenery, and let your friend play photographer! Take as many pics as you need to until you’re satisfied with one! Put that picture out there for everybody to see. Hearing positive responses from others will lift your spirits up even more! Look at that picture whenever you’re not on your A game. Whenever you feel like you’re not good enough. Everybody has times when they don’t feel pretty! Let it remind you that you’re gorgeous and have better days!

2. Jammin’

One can appreciate the art of music, am I right? There’s not a single person I know that doesn’t like music (I mean, is music hatred even a thing?). I don’t feel like I even have to say that MUSIC INFLUENCES ATTITUDE. Music is to humans as good lightning is to a picture (ya dig?). You gotta have it! Make yourself a playlist! I have multiple playlists for every one of my moods…and GURLLLL, I’ve got a lot of moods. I have a slow one, an upbeat one (actually like 5, but who’s counting?), a Christian one for when I feel like praising the Lord, a Bluegrass playlist, (my guilty pleasure) and SO many more. Spotify premium is the shiz. Put together a bunch of songs that make YOU happy. Nobody has to know what songs you choose. It’s for you! Listen to it when you’re driving. When you’re cleaning your house. When you’re laying in bed. Consider it a healthy distraction. ๐Ÿ˜Š

3. Yes ma’amin’

You know that feeling that you get when you’ve done something right? When you’ve helped somebody else? When you’ve held the door for a mom who is pushing a stroller and has another kid on her hip? Do you see where I’m going with this? Be NICE. And to clear up any confusion, you have to be nice to men, as well. ‘Yes sir’ just didn’t work with the title. Something as little as donating a dollar to St. Jude’s will give you that same old warm feeling. How would it make you feel if it was raining and somebody offered to let you borrow their umbrella? How would you feel if you were broke, you see a really yummy looking burrito, and your friend offers to buy it for you? Freaking AWESOME, right? Let me tell you, they feel the same way knowing that they were the ones that made you happy. Try THAT out for size. Helping others helps YOU! Don’t believe me? Try it. You’ll thank me later.

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